Friday, January 30

Bathroom Conversations

Last Saturday afternoon, as we were house bound together, Drew said some fabulous words, "I need go potty!"

Drew's Dad sprang to his feet, immediately grabbed Drew and carried him upstairs to the potty. Drew's Sister was right behind them, proclaiming, "Drew, I will show you how to do it. That's what big sister's do!"

I remained seated. Seriously, Drew is a crazy boy, and I will be lucky if he is potty trained by the time he is three years old and starts preschool. I have no delusions about that, and I knew this time wasn't going to be any different.

Drew's Dad sat Drew on his little potty, and Drew's Sister climbed on her "big girl potty" and they both began to do their business, which for Drew meant playing with himself. I mean, he is a boy after all, and that is what boys do best. (This is where the story gets a little PG-13, so I will try to do my best.) As Drew's Dad tells the story, Drew began to play with himself so much that "it" became, um..., erect.

Drew immediately got a concerned look on his face, and then glancing up at his Dad questioned, "What's that? What's that? What's that?," over and over.

I can only imagine the look on my husbands face, and as he hurriedly tried to come up with an answer to his two year old son's question. "Drew, that is your wiener!"

"Weeeee-nah. Weeeee-nah?" Drew continued, pointing at it with his index finger. "Weeeeee-nah!"

I of course, was still sitting in the living room as this was unfolding, when I hear my name being shouted urgently from upstairs. I sprang to my feet, wondering what on Earth needed my attention so quickly. As I approached the bathroom door I heard, "Weeeee-nah!" I opened the door to find Drew's Dad sitting on the edge of the tub, Drew's Sister sitting on the big girl potty, and Drew, sitting on his little potty, pointing to his penis, saying "Weeeee-nah?"

I could not help but laugh. My little boy, with an erection sitting on his potty, calling it a wiener, over and over. (I feel a bit like Jodi in this post.)

"You called?," I asked my husband.

"Yes," Drew's Dad replied. "He asked me what that is, and I told him it was his wiener. I'm now thinking that isn't the best thing to call it."

"Um, no," I said. "I don't think wiener is good. How about we call it what it is? His penis?"

"Okay," Drew's Dad said, turning his attention back to Drew. "Drew, that is your penis. Can you say penis?"

Drew looked at his Dad for a minute. Then began to touch himself again. "Weeee-nuhhhh!," he proclaimed.

I think this crazy boy is going to be hard to potty train...and raise!


Tom's mum said...

how funny. We have had many conversations like that with Tom. The first few times it happened he got a bit freaked out and usually shouted things like "it's up, make it go down, I want it down, argh it's up". He's a bit more discrete now and keeps quiet about it!!
Good luck

Mom2BeautifulGirl said...

That is hysterical, Drew's mom. He is going to give you run for your money. Thanks for sharing.

Kel said...

OK, I'm dying here! That definitely gets my vote for funniest story of the week!

Lucas'Mommy said...

Hilarious! Thanks for that great laugh!

Jennifer said...

I am laughing out loud here. It's been so long since I've had a little boy in the son will be 16 on Wednesday! That was just too cute!

Landon's Mom said...

That is hilarious!! Welcome to the world of boys. I'm hoping the girl will be easier because I've definitely gotten a lot of gray hairs in the last 6 years! Luckily we learned to make sure and use the correct names on something a little less personal than that. When Landon was first using a fork, we used to say "stick it" so now we can't get him to say fork - he asks for a stick.

misskri said...

Oh my...that story is too funny. We are still trying to potty train Thomas ~he will be 3 in April.

leahlefler said...

Boys! We get the comment "it get big! Why it get big?" from my 3 year old. And he's only 1/2 way potty trained, so I'm glad he has a late birthday and will be almost four before starting "real" preschool!

Celeste said...

I am laughing out loud, so funny! Aren't boys a joy?!

Ben's Mom said...

That is hilarious. Thanks for the good laugh!

tammy said...

Absolutely hilarious! I'm still laughing! That's much better though than what my brothers used to call it ... "worm".