As we transition to Kindergarten, it is time once again for a multi-factored evaluation and writing of a school-age IEP. I'll share the details of that with you soon, as everything should be finalized by the week end.
As I prepared for the meeting with our school district this week, I came across all of Drew's diagnostic testing from five and a half years ago. There is something about reading, "Findings suggest that Andrew has profound hearing loss in both ears," and "no response," that, even to this day, makes me incredibly sad.
My emotions are so mixed. I am so incredibly happy with how well Drew has done with his cochlear implants, and I'm so incredibly thankful for this technology. But I'm still struck at times by the sadness of having a child with a disability, of being told there is something wrong with my child. In some ways, I hate the fact that I even know how to read an auidogram, or that I understand the workings of the cochlea. On the other hand, I am so thankful that I've gone through this journey, as I've met so many wonderful people and I have such a wonderful appreciation for the miracle of hearing. But I hate this for Drew. I hate the unknown challenges he will encounter. If I could take it all back, I would.
3 comments:
I hope the meeting goes smoothly, especially considering the 3-5 transition. I feel the same way, having mixed emotions. Even when life is so smooth, you know new challenges lie ahead. Still thankful and amazed every single day though, just like you.
Hello,
My name is John and I have a quick question about your blog! Could you please email me?
Thank you,
John
I'm glad you wrote this honest post. My situation is similar to yours. There's so much pressure to "JUST BE POSITIVE", and grateful, and happy, and optimistic. And of course we should be all those things. But every once in a while, its important to step back and allow ourselves to be afraid, and to worry, and to grieve - for the hardship our little ones will necessarily face, no matter how heroic our efforts. So- kudos to you for doing so publically, and making it a bit more 'alright' for other parents to do the same.
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